Picture the scene…

A “FOR RENT” sign on the front lawn. A bunch of boxes on the porch. That’s enough details for this particular scene.

Neighbor – we’ll call her A – comes along.

A: “You’re moving?”

Me: stops and stares.Nope, just looking for someone to move in with us. We’re providing the boxes they need to move!” “Yep.”

A: “Oh, okay.”

Here's your sign... <image from http://www.fanpop.com&gt;

Picture the scene…

You come in to work, hobbling. You are grimacing in pain, and rubbing your leg when you sit down.

Coworker – we’ll call her B – comes along.

B: “You feeling alright?”

Me: must not roll eyes. must not roll eyes. ‘Yep, I just heard faking like you don’t feel well is the newest craze.’ “Leg hurts.”

B: “Oh. What happened?”

Me: “Fell.”

B: “That must have hurt.”

Please, God... <image from http://www.newsrealblog.com&gt;

One more…

It’s almost lunch-time. You’re talking with a friend. Your stomach suddenly growls loudly.

Your friend – whom we’ll call C – who knows you hate stupid questions, decides to speak up anyway.

C: “You hungry?”

Me: “Nope. I’m practicing for the America’s Got Talent. Trying to train my stomach to sing the national anthem.”

Enough said. <image from whatgoeshere.net>

Friends: The people you don’t think twice before being snarky at.